In the game?

As in the previous post, I’m using tidbits from my story to tell what I want, in terms of this blog. And I’m still on the second of three things - to help people understand what following Christ looks like. From my vantage point, of course…

It’s interesting to me that about the time my life started to get visibly messy (it was behind the scenes messy long before) was about the time I started to learn the most about following Christ. And about what kind of follower He wants…

I thought that I would be of little use to God once the road to, and through, divorce started, and that made me very sad because I really wanted to serve Him and bring Him glory – even then. I was totally expecting to have to sit quietly on the sidelines – watching all the action, but knowing I’d no longer be called into the game. I was sure that I was now like the injured player who could still wear the jersey, and may get a few sympathy pats from a teammate now and then, but would soon be forgotten, as I watched the game from my spot on the bench. But I had a surprise ahead.

As I began to walk through my new life as a separated and then divorced person, suddenly I began connecting with unbelievers at every turn. Oddly enough, a handful of them, and not most of my Christian friends, became my support group. They helped me through the tough, lonely times, when many Christians acted like nothing huge was happening to me. I was gushing blood, but it was almost like no one at church saw it. And I’m positive most, if not all, didn’t intend, even for a second, to enlarge my wounds. They simply didn’t know what to do with me, or what to say to me. I was an elder’s daughter, a pioneer missionary’s granddaughter, a Sunday school teacher, a worship team member…and was initiating divorce (needless to say, not lightly). It (I?) was scary to many, I think, and I guess understandably so. Yet it hurt… (A few Christians - my sisters and niece especially - were huge supports to me, I must say, for which I'm forever grateful.)

But God’s love and grace are huge. He never, ever abandoned me or let me down. And it really should be of no great surprise to us when people fail us. I’ve told my kids that many times. “I love you so much and don’t ever want to fail you, but unfortunately I will. But don’t look to me; look to God. He will never fail you.”

Does God "not failing me" mean I always get what I want? Of course not… I never wanted to be divorced, for example. But life on this earth, which is broken by sin, is only temporary and my Jesus walks through it with me, and will bring me safely into eternity with Him. That is how God never fails me. That is how I’m never alone. That is why I write this blog…to encourage others. To tell people: “Don’t look to me or my grandparents. We will fail you. But look at our God. He will never ever fail you.”

(In the game? to be continued...)